i have been thinking about being a parent latley. That old saying that you wont understand until you have a child 100% correct. You may think you know but you dont. My sister even said this a few months after her son was born, she laughed about all the things she had said to me about parenthood before he was born. ‘Ill just get a baby sitter’ is a good one, ‘ill totally keep working out’ nice thought until she was 3months pregnant, ‘people who over stay their visit’ yep new parents may be bored but having people over is just a new level of stress, you cant concentrate on the convo, they keep the baby awake, your routine gets thrown out. Or my fave ‘i can drink ill just pump first’ this one she learnt quickly. Not only will some babies not take a bottle but the idea that you will feel like ‘partying’ as a new parent is ridiculious. Of course when i tried to tell her any of this before she had him i got met with rolled eyes and ‘you will see’ comments. Or even better people who plan holidays for the babies first year? I mean why?!? How the mighty fall haha
Now that im the mother of a toddler im still trying to tell people my limits. They never believe me. ‘Dont let him out of the pram he will just run off’ is usually met with, he will be fine followed by, oh maybe we should have left him in the pram as he sprints for the road. Or my sister often asks us for bbqs which would be great except she wants to go to the lake, where i will spend the entire time running after rue and zero time eating or joining in conversations. Or grandparents who try and give him 5cream biscuits then wonder why he threw up. But when i said no more than one i get rolled eyes. So when a parent tells your their rules and boundaries dont roll your eyes. Stop and think that there may actually be a reason for those rules! Because you know, i only spend 24/7 with him. How would i know what he will do?
One thing that has always bugged me though starts from day one. When a new mum goes into hospital and her main concern is shaving her legs and straightening her hair…the fact that in todays society women are more concerned with shaving their legs than recovering and having a few days to relax and bond is so sad to me. When i said this to my mothers group when they were listing their hospital bag contents they all said ‘oh but i cant relax knowing im all hairy and my hairs a mess. I still have to look good.’ It makes me so sad that women think that they dont look good as they are. No one else cares that your legs are hairy and frankly who is looking that close, or that your hair is in a pony rather than streightened. We as women need to just step back and accept what we look like and who we are without all of the primping and priming that we do daily. Just be.